Little Rock flooded. I don’t hate my job. I’ve become a total recluse. I spend every waking second planning things – camping trips, paint selections, wardrobe renovations, house purchases, weddings for people who aren’t having them, assaults.
I could have possibly lost my mind.
Look at this though…
Do you know how awesome it would be to have that? I’d totally jump out of it onto other balloons and jack them. Arrrrrr.
I’m anticipating having my shit together and buying a house this year. I’m excited. I’ve found some really amazing houses in Hot Springs for less than 40k. We’re already going over the remodels that can be done to update things. The whole family is excited. Nana wants to move that direction, as well. I think it will work out nicely.
Normally I don’t really care much about politics and issues relating to it. All politicians are liars and manipulators. They don’t care what happens as long as they benefit while they are alive. I really feel this whole “party” thing is absurd. What’s REALLY the difference? Whatever one side is for, the other is against. Neither stance is really helpful, at all, to anyone.
Please, allow me a moment to bring up a really special issue: the release of rapists back into society with little regard to what their actions have done to not only the victim but victimization of women as a whole. So, because Jane Doe was raped and he has no prior convictions (note: many crimes never reach convictions because they are thrown out for various reasons, seek deals in order to turn over someone else for some other issue or the victim simply never comes forward out of fear) for any assaults of any kind, he should be given a shorter sentence? But ole cliff over here with 3 ounces of weed is going to jail for 30 years? How does this work?
Today, a female, in my training class, actually said that she believes that the man who raped Anne Pressly who is innocent. I know there have been several instances of not 100% evidence. They found hair that was similar to his but there was no root to test DNA. The fluids found on her were devoid of sperm, therefor they couldn’t test it fully, either. There was more stuff that went on but many things point to him doing it. AND he confessed. Her reasoning is “I’d be upset if they gave all that time to my baby.” Really? You’d be upset that your GROWN son was given life in prison, not the death penalty, for brutally murdering and raping a woman? Wow. Statements like that are what set the hood back a half a century.
Back to my point. In the news is this man in Washington that went to a coffee shop and shot some police officers. He was granted clemency in Arkansas for several robberies and having a gun, among other things. Huckabee then commuted his sentence (shortened it) which made him eligible for parole sooner. The judge even supported him being released. Why? That’s a big fail on their part. The really great part is the fact he was accused, and had been in custody, of raping a child. As much as Arkansas failed, why did Washington not have a VIOLENT criminal in custody instead of releasing him on bond? I promise, right now, there are people being held for minor offenses but first time minor offenses.
Like I already pointed out once tonight, this isn’t the first time Huckabee has dropped the ball. He aided in the parole, illegally might I add, of Wayne Dumond. He murdered a man in Oklahoma, raped several women and a young girl. Huckabee then got him released and he promptly went to Missouri and raped and murdered a woman. P.S. he was castrated already, so drop the “we should castrate all sex offenders” crap. They don’t do it for the sex, they do it for the control and pleasure they get from the violation and control.
I’m just so angry. Why do politicians fight for abortion to be illegal but continue to ignore the issue of rape? Why are violent criminals continuously released on sexual assault cases?
And why has it taken this long for people to see that Huckabee isn’t this amazing politician that was a sure contender for the 2012 election. He’s a hypocritical asshole. I’m glad everyone is seeing his fail now.
I’ve been really down lately for reasons most my friends know. It’s really hard having a positive outlook on things when your heart just isn’t in it. The fact my birthday is in this only adds to the negative thoughts.
I don’t look at a birthday the way a lot of people do. To me, a birthday is like your own little New Years. Think of it as my Stormynese New Year. I reflect over what I’ve done, what I haven’t done, areas I need to focus on, etc. It’s also a celebration of ME. My impact on someone, the silly things I’ve done, and most importantly – just me feeling special. Maybe this is how everyone sees a birthday but I really don’t think so.
I received my first present and I think it’s really excellent. Felicia got me a bottle of my favorite Sunny D. I really couldn’t be anymore amused and happy. I even drank some of it hot – from the bottle!! All mine.
In all honesty, no fun gifts will shake this mood. The thing I want, need, more than anything is to have a surprise visit from someone. I keep hoping for it every day. In a perfect world, Jake would show up Monday afternoon and surprise me and give me something in a little box (or pouch or plastic bubble from the vending machine, not picky) and tell me all those sweet nothings. I detest the fact I hold out hope for the impossible.
I guess it’s because I’ve lost so much control over my life, but I’ve gone into Spring clean mode. Unfortunately, I’m addicted to some seriously questionable Facebook games and this slows down my cleaning. Hey, at least they are free and they aren’t entire pixilated worlds.
I like to start my day off with a little Clean House, maybe some Design On A Dime. Then, I gather some laundry and take notes. I eventually pull myself together enough to start cleaning. I get overwhelmed and go beat up some folks on the games. Then, it’s regroup time again. I am the slowest, uncoordinated cleaner in the world.
It’s crazy trying to put everything I have into one room again. Not everything fits, not everything looks good. Ok, who am I kidding, everything I have doesn’t fit together at all. Being poor is hard. I think that’s another reason for my crazy constant cleaning and freaking out.
Anyway, ASAP there has to be some serious restyling of this place. Once money gets better, we are going to start working on the house one room at a time and preparing it for sale. Most likely we are going to move most everything to storage before we attempt to stage it. I think they are actually listening to me on this.
I really love remodeling. It makes me so happy. One of my biggest dreams is to get a house and fix it up all on my own. Sick, I know.
Back on track – I think this clutter, mess and chaos is making me go insane. I can’t sit still, I can’t focus. Or maybe it’s because it’s 2am and I’m a displaced crazy cat lady.
I really hope to start taking random photos again. I miss documenting my life with out of focus photos.
Due to crazy circumstances I am officially back home in Arkansas. I’m trying to maintain a positive outlook and be happy. I don’t have rent! I don’t have red wasps! 90% less fire ants! No Dustin Turner! No Lufkin! Food!
Unfortunately, there are a lot of negatives. I’m back home like a big ole fail. There’s no internet. There’s barking dogs. The room I’m in has mold from a leak. There are folks dying. FELICIA. No job. Most importantly: no Jake.
I’ve gotten really comfortable in living on my own. It’s quiet, there’s no pants, everything is exactly where I leave it. Jake spent every weekend with me and a night through the week. I felt good about doing the damn thing. It’s super hard adjust and so far I’m still on my first week. Hell, it hasn’t even been 24 hours of just me and the family yet.
The kittens and I are chilling on this insanely awesome bed for now. I imagine I’ll have more time to contemplate my life and how I’ve gone off the designated path.
